Retain Honey, After the Honeymoon…With George Kimani

“For better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health.” We all hear recitation of these marriage vows. At least for couples who confidently stand before friends and family. I have attended a number of weddings lately of young people ready to conquer anything that come their way, until they say “I do.” as they move from me to we. Well, I have some advise for them, as a friend, a colleague and  a writer and a married man.

Once they are joined together, off they go to  honeymoon –a stage involving couples remaining together most of the time, going around sightseeing and sanctify their marriage.  Believe you me, it is at honeymoon that  romance peaks and starts fading and the intimacy brings in too much closer focus of the partner’s “real nature” more and more.

By the time the honeymoon ends, the couple becomes too familiar to each other. This familiarity factor brings in lots of relaxation in one’s cultivated good habits and manners.  Subsequently; you start taking your partner for granted and you remove some of your masks. It is quite natural. But throwing them away totally into dustbins is rather uncalled for. What is the back borne of enjoying marital bliss after honeymoon phase is over? The following ways will help you retain honey, after honeymoon.

Behave decently with the opposite sex

You showed respect to her/his relatives, you  behaved decently with women or men of opposite sex,  you also curtailed your ogling tendencies to other women and men. This should continue  immediately after your marriage. This is not a habit to be thrown away into dust bin.

Personal hygiene and grooming

After the honeymoon take care of your personal hygiene, grooming and manners. Or were  you not extremely careful with these things during honeymoon?  Take a few extra minutes to groom yourself the way you did in the beginning of the relationship. Not only can it help keep the marriage bliss alive and awake, but it will even make you feel better as a person.  Post honeymoon requires good nurturing by the couple and this includes proper grooming.

Communicate and listen

At honeymoon, you were too willing to hear her/him speak, you listened to one another in all seriousness, you expressed your feelings in all efforts. This habit should be nurtured to a high degree after honeymoon. During honey moon, of course, you spoke a lot, but you heard him a lot too. You were all ears to hear his/her fond memories, You were too glad to please each other always during honey moon; you derived pleasure in pleasing him. Because he was not so far too intimately familiar to you, you were somewhat modest and wanted to show some respect.  Now, when one or both of you are not listening to one another, you have a problem in your marriage. If the lack of listening continues, your marriage could be in jeopardy.  The listening problem in your marriage could be related to issues that your spouse has, your method of delivery, or a combination of both.  To retain honey after honeymoon you must enhance your communication and listening abilities.

Romance

There is romance in holding hands, being together, talking sweet nothings, listening to one another, playfulness, spending quality time together, extending  a helping hand to her or him. The more you do this after honeymoon stage, the more you are poised for a blissful marital life.  Touching is very important.

Finally, if you are preparing for marriage, or are a newlywed, think of your marriage as a great and noble adventure, a wonderful exciting challenge. You want to be as knowledgeable and as well-equipped as possible on how to take care of each other so that your marriage can make it and plant your marriage flag on the mountain top. If you are in a relationship, whether it be brand new or long-standing, keep in mind that there are things that you should not give up after the honeymoon phase is over.