Posted by: George Kimani | August 1, 2016

When He Has No Guts to Propose|George Kimani

In our culture women are not supposed to pursue a man let alone propose. Men are supposed to be in charge, to know what they want and to pursue it. Women on the other hand are to be passive and wait for the man of their dreams to come along. But what happens when that man you love lacks the courage to either ask you out or even propose?

As much as men are supposed to be aware of their feelings and know what to do a good number don’t have the confidence to pursue them and would rather let things take a natural path. Ever realized how many men asks a girl out only after a nudging from her girlfriend or the teasing from the boys.

indexWhen you have all the signs he is into you and he won’t ask you out his friend who is your acquaintance can help you ascertain his feelings for you. He is also in a good place to nudge him into doing something about the feelings if they exist. Another asset is your girlfriend who is a common friend. She can nudge him and push him into getting in touch with his feelings.

Many men can’t stand being told ‘No’ and this makes them fear asking. As a woman when you see signs that he is into you but is acting afraid, you can make it easy for him to come out by showing interest. It could mean calling him a little more to ‘just catch up,” or inviting him for that mountain hike by your church group. Do it in a way that doesn’t portray you as desperate but instead as a friend wanting to spend time with a friend. A giggle or winking back might be all he needs to come out.

A final step which I don’t recommend unless you are absolutely sure is asking him out. It can be smartly done in a way that leaves him thinking he did the asking. Ask questions like “would you come for my wedding?” or “Where do you see us in two years?” or the toughest of them all: “What do you think we are doing here?”

Being the one making the effort might be a little uncomfortable, but it is a small price to pay because it helps you know where you stand. If you are lucky you two will get together and do away with all the anxiety. If he doesn’t feel like you think or feel it will at least help you to move on without holding your breath about him asking!


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